Patong at night

I arrived in the typically ugly Thai town of Phuket at 5:30 am, only 12 hours, not 15. Still too long, though. I dreaded facing the mob of touts, but to my surprise, they ignored me, the only farang on the bus. I finally got a motorbike driver to take me to Patong for the exhorbiant price of 150 baht. It was pretty far, though - the island is huge.

I actually had bought a Lonely Planet before the trip, but as usual, I never look at it. I used my rudimentary Thai to tell my driver to take me to a cheap hotel. He asked around, and took me to the nice Baan Ton Sai (Late Morning House). More than I wanted to pay at 600 baht, but A/C, and for 20 baht I can take a motorbike to the beach/town.

Patong is really something else. An entire town dedicated to tourism. Like all Thai towns, it’s not much to look at during the day, with street after street of shops, restaurants, hotels, travel agents, massage parlors, and empty beer bars. But the transformation at night was shocking. Everything is lit up, supersized tuk tuks line the sidewalks, and said beer bars are packed with Thai women shouting “hello welcome” at passersby and dancing on tables, and middle-aged European tourists in search of a girlfriend. The place is geared towards an older and more affluent crowd than I am accustomed to, and is hippy free.

Beach guy

The beach is OK, but the bay is full of boats and jet skis, and the beach is packed with jet skis and chairs. If you want to sit, you have to rent a chair for 50 baht ($1.25). Making matters worse is the prevalence of topless overweight middle-aged European tourists. Finally, every time I go to the beach, it rains.

Today I arranged transport to Penang for Tuesday. Fourteen hours. Hopefully I can take the train back to Bangkok.

Now I’m trying to decide if I am going to dive. I’ve become the ultimate cheapskate since I’ve been living in Bangkok without a job.

Oh, and like most transliterations of Thai words, “Phuket” is spelled wrong. It is pronounced poo-get.